Wednesday, 20 April 2011

The end of the end. My rear end that is.

totally not mine
Not that I'm bragging, but I once had a very fine rear end indeed. It was a head turner, for sure, and almost definitely the reason my husband was hooked, if not the reason he proposed. A good few months into my first pregnancy, though, I spotted a problem.

I forsaw the end of my end, so to speak.

Somewhere along the way, my body had started to use completely different muscles to accommodate my changing shape. Abs were a lost cause, that much was to be expected... but my glutes? Oh no! So 2 babies later, I find myself feeling young at heart but stuck with Mono Bum, seemingly about a foot lower than it used to be. Think you don't know Mono Bum? Next time you're standing in the queue for the post office, (discreetly) check out all the little old ladies in their tan slacks. Ergh.

Anyhow, as there doesn't seem to be a wonderbra for post-baby Mono Bum, I've opted for good old fashioned exercise to see if that will get everything back where it belongs.

Never one to do anything in moderation, I've decided to give my "Goodbye Mono Bum" (do you think Elton John will mind if I use that in a song?) exercise regime a bit of a kick start with the Zumba-thon.

I reckon if I train well enough to get through 3 hours of crazy aerobic latin dancing without the assistance of Jagerbombs, then surely a side-effect might be that I can once again wear my favourite Replay jeans without the horrible squoosh effect.

If you're up for joining my zumbathon team, or giving me enough sponsorship to entice me to create a photo-time-lapse post of Mono Bum's progress, then get in touch!!

Tuesday, 19 April 2011

Easter Mayhem in the ReallyKidFriendly House

I've asked some small and very over-excited people in my house to help with this little vlog about our Easter plans. Apparently the most exciting thing we'll be doing is sleeping in bunk beds - Skipton Castle, the Forbidden Corner and Bolton Abbey don't even get a mention!

Warning: Tiger Moms might find my childrens' behaviour (and the fact that I appear totally oblivious to it) somewhat distressing.

Sunday, 17 April 2011

A glimpse of the real me!

Oh dear, I've been tagged by Jennifer Howze from Jenography in a "meme" inspired by The Guardian weekend Q&A and feel compelled to respond. For those of you who don't know her, pop over to her blog, Jenography. Methinks you'll recognise her writing style from her AlphaMummy column at The Times.

I hope you enjoy this glimpse of the real me...

When were you happiest?
Nepal - Sagamartha Trek - Ngozumba Gl from Gokyo Ri
the view from Gokyo Ri (yes, that's Everest in the distance)

I had one of the happiest days of my life on my 25th birthday. My friend Megan and I had been hiking in Nepal for a few weeks, having accidentally started our hike 9 days walk away from the start of the trail (doh!). We had a "rest day" to acclimatise before the final push up to Gokyo Ri, so we relaxed by body-tobogganing and making snow angels on the pristine mountainsides, much to the amusement of the Nepali children watching from below. Birthday supplies being limited, Megan sang me Happy Birthday and made me blow out our Emergency Candle.

What was your most embarrassing moment?
Splitting my trousers while playing baseball when I was in school.

Aside from property, what’s the most expensive thing you’ve bought?
My wedding dress!

What is your most treasured possession?
Am I allowed to say my iPhone? Is that really horrible? OK, then, my scruffy little white bear from when I was little - he has since taken up residence in my daughter's room. His official name was Charity Bear, but I call him Char.

Where would you like to live?
Easy -  Montreal.

What’s your favourite smell?
mint julep
bourbon, my favourite smell
Kouros. Ha ha. No... I think it has to be either be the minted bourbon smell of a Mint Julep, or my Auntie Rosita's cooking. She makes a mean prawn curry.

Who would play you in the film of your life?
Oh, I would love to play it myself!! My husband would like me to be played by Kate Beckinsale, with him starring as himself.

What is your favourite book?
A Prayer for Owen Meany by John Irving.

What is your most unappealing habit?
Gosh, I've got loads. Clicking my neck seems to freak most people out though.

What would be your fancy dress costume of choice?
I'm still in love with my silver Vanessa Kensington outfit. Shame I can't fit into it anymore!

What is your earliest memory?
I don't know! I used to think it was when I was walking backwards and bumped into Mr Snuffalufagus, but my mother claims I've mixed that memory with my favourite TV show.

guilty pleasure
What is your guiltiest pleasure?
Tony Soprano.

What do you owe your parents?
My inability to say no to anything! It makes for great adventures and lovely surprises that would never otherwise be possible.

To whom would you like to say sorry, and why?
To anyone I've even given that famous cold stare to. And to my big brother for kicking him in the head that one time.

What does love feel like?
Complicated and easy, comforting and painful, all at the same time.

What was the best kiss of your life?
It's a secret! It was so good though that just the thought still makes my knees go weak.

Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
"I'm going to count to three..." and "ummm..yeah."

What is the worst job you have ever done?
Hot Dog Cart on Fifth Ave
This is not me! But it could well have been.
I sold hot dogs from one of those little carts in downtown Winnipeg when I was about 15. I hadn't learned how to cook yet and had never operated a BBQ before in my life, so goodness knows how many people got food poisoning.

If you could edit your past, what would you change?
Most of the time I would say everything. But then I wonder how different a person I would have become... so maybe nothing. Don't know.

What is the closest you have come to death?
Too close for comfort, at a party about 10 years ago.

What do you consider your greatest achievement?
Playing music in front of people, despite a pathological fear of public performance! You can read more about my little musical interlude here, or watch some videos here!

When did you last cry and why?
A few weeks ago, coming home from seeing my friend in hospital after he was attacked.

How do you relax?
Fun dance classes like Zumba and Freez.

What single thing would improve the quality of your life?
More hours in the day.

What is the most important lesson life has taught you?
Saying yes, even when you're uncertain, opens doors and creates opportunities you wouldn't otherwise have had.

And with that, I'm passing this meme onto..

It's A Mummy's Life
Marketing to Milk
Mediocre Mum

Friday, 8 April 2011

Do you blog for Google or for your audience?

Little old me, chatting about why I started blogging, why blogging for Google works well but is incredibly dull, and why blogging about fun, interesting stuff made me super happy at the playground last month.

Oh, I should mention that it's my first ever "vlog", and British Mummy Bloggers made me do it. Even though they know I am not british, don't know how to apply make-up (to look good on camera!) or speak with a proper accent, and that I say "um" and "you know" a lot. So, um, have fun watching!